Emotional Reality / Compassion

Since I'm a recent blogger, as in every new-found love, I'm still discovering my 'inner blogger' and the nature of this recent relationship; my rhythm and content, my patterns, my readers etc. I'm by no means a seasoned blog reader neither, so I just have to free style it. Although I have the notion I should write about my daily experiences, I find it boring to regurgitate the occurrences of my day...and in fact my inner experiences often have only slight logical resemblance to what actually happens in 'reality'. In short, I'm a dreamer, and I tend to live in my own creation of a 'reality' like I assume we all do. Mine, has a high emotional notes, and my feelings often take charge and carry me into distant lands of inner experiences...
However, I'm intrigued with this new relationship I have with you, the reader. I'm wondering what my blog readers are interested in: Odissi Dance? Yoga? India? My life? If you feel inspired to share the interests that are prompting you to keep reading, please do. Thus it can become more complete, rather then me talking my mind to no one. As I mentioned in an earlier post, one of the breakthroughs I recently had is using writing as means of communication, and so I would love to include listening as well.

The other day I had a surge of compassion take over me. A chain of occurrences stripped me down of the usual armor of aloofness I wear as I'm readying myself to face the world. The suffering I saw all around besieged me. The harshness of life, the difficulty everybody are facing as they try to make it through yet another day. It hit me straight in the heart and overwhelmed me with love and compassion to all. Whatever lot of suffering I normally carry around vanished. There was no room for it. My heart was filled with gratitude, love, and compassion to all beings.

Don't get me wrong; it is not like India is such a miserable place. I could just as well write about all the uncontrollable ecstasy and contentment in the midst of poverty. The suffering here is probably no less in measure then in the US, or any other place, but here, like everything else, it is available to see, feel and touch. The street dogs are suffering, the hard-labor poor ladies in colorful saris are suffering, the fruit vendors are suffering, and the businessman who are buying these fruit are suffering too.

Well, after a couple days of my shifted consciousness, for lack of a better way to explain it, I started to look deeper into negative emotions, and the choices we can make to navigate our emotional experience. I saw that jealousy inhabit the cracks lack of confidence and trust leave. Hatred inhibits lack of love, sadness lack of joy etc. And once an emotional pattern takes a residence in our heart and mind, even in the slightest way, it builds a momentum and over time becomes a pattern. These uncontrollable and unconscious patterns consume our life force, and take us 'down'. We all have this little 'cracks' unless we are fully enlightened. But we have a choice. And the first step is self-honesty and self-awareness.

When we find ourselves jealous, for example, we can shift to examine our sense of self-confidence, and the foundation of honesty in our relationships. We can develop and strengthen our inner confidence, study ourselves, meet our power, and live our truth; carry our Dharma. We often fear our own integrity or lack of it more then others. Shifting our focus inwards, relaying on our inner resources and knowledge give us the courage to shine our light, live our passion, and make choices for the betterment and well-being of all beings.